Daniel was a servant of God known for integrity. What is integrity? Definition: The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.

Wikipedia says this about integrity:   Integrity is a concept of consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations, and outcomes. In ethics, integrity is regarded as the honesty and truthfulness or accuracy of one’s actions. Integrity can be regarded as the opposite of hypocrisy,[1] in that it regards internal consistency as a virtue, and suggests that parties holding apparently conflicting values should account for the discrepancy or alter their beliefs.

Integrity is the opposite of duplicity and hypocrisy.

Duplicity: contradictory doubleness of thought, speech, or action; especially : the belying of one’s true intentions by deceptive words or action.

Hypocrisy:  1. The practice of professing beliefs, feelings, or virtues that one does not hold or possess; falseness.  2. An act or instance of such falseness.

Daniel’s integrity was tested many times. In one occasion enemies of Daniel tended a trap for him. They got the king to sign off on an edict that declared that anyone who petitioned any god or man except the king for 30 days was to be thrown into the lion’s den. (Dan. 6:7)

They knew Daniel had the custom of praying 3 times a day to God. What did Daniel do when he learned of the edict? Daniel 6:10 (HCSB) – ” When Daniel learned that the document had been signed, he went into his house. The windows in its upper room opened toward Jerusalem, and three times a day he got down on his knees, prayed, and gave thanks to his God, just as he had done before.”

Daniel could have hidden the fact that he was praying to God. For thirty days he could have given the impression that he was obeying the edict. But he did not. He was a man of integrity.

Integrity is honesty at all costs. It is telling the truth even when it hurts to do so. It is not trying to give one impression with one’s actions and inside thinking something entirely different.

Meditating on these matters recently has deeply troubled me. Am I being duplicit or a hypocrite? Am I pretending to have beliefs and opinions that I no longer possess when I am with JWs? Am I putting on a pretense so as to fool others so that I can escape the pain of being DFed? Am I becoming skilled in deception, so that I am no longer guileless? Can I remain innocent with a hidden agenda?

I have considered what Jesus said in Matthew 10:16 – “Look, I’m sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as serpents and as harmless as doves.”

The commentary of Jamieson, Fausset, and Brown of 1871 says this about this verse:

16. Behold, I send you forth–The “I” here is emphatic, holding up Himself as the Fountain of the Gospel ministry, as He is also the Great Burden of it.
as sheep–defenseless.
in the midst of wolves–ready to make a prey of you ( John 10:12 ). To be left exposed, as sheep to wolves, would have been startling enough; but that the sheep should be sent among the wolves would sound strange indeed. No wonder this announcement begins with the exclamation, “Behold.”
be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves–Wonderful combination this! Alone, the wisdom of the serpent is mere cunning, and the harmlessness of the dove little better than weakness: but in combination, the wisdom of the serpent would save them from unnecessary exposure to danger; the harmlessness of the dove, from sinful expedients to escape it. In the apostolic age of Christianity, how harmoniously were these qualities displayed! Instead of the fanatical thirst for martyrdom, to which a later age gave birth, there was a manly combination of unflinching zeal and calm discretion, before which nothing was able to stand.

The religion that we have been a part of is unyielding in it’s demands for obedience and submission. What do we do so as to be a person of integrity in this situation? Must we either speak out or just leave? Can we continue to give an appearance of submission and obedience and not be hypocritical?

In this article I have only discussed thoughts that I myself have entertained. I do not presume to advise other awakened JWs on how they should act. Proverbs 24:6 says – ” for you should wage war with sound guidance- victory comes with many counselors”.

So what comments do you brothers and sisters have on these issues?

 

 

 

 

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32 Comments on The Fight For Integrity

  1. greybeard says:

    Thank you for your honesty and fine article Andrew. I know where you are coming from. For me, life has been much easier sense I stopped going to meetings. I take it you are still going. That has got to be very difficult. I feel the sooner one can stop the better. However, if you must go, I would not incriminate myself. Jesus never did… (Edit- Until it was time to…) Maybe you are going so you can reach others, kinda like a spy. When the Israelites sent spies into a land they didn’t run around announcing who they were or what they thought did they? Neither should we. Our situation, I believe, is very much different than Daniel’s. We have stopped bowing down to the governing body and that should go unnoticed if we play our cards right. Daniel’s views on worship never changed. Ours have. We are more like first century Christians leaving the old things behind and following Christ. Leaving a legalistic religion for a faith governed by love with no man but Christ as our head as scripture indicates. I have asked myself the same questions. Am I being true to Christ by proclaiming my new beliefs to my friends and family? I have told those I can and recently sent e-mail letters to my family. I may get DFed for it but I felt compelled. I think the Holy Spirit moves us to take the necessary steps at the right time. Your honesty and fine articles have helped more people than you are aware of. You have helped me more than you know. Thank you for all of your fine efforts and keep up the good work!

    Your brother in Christ,
    Gerybeard

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  2. LonelySheep says:

    Andrew, Daniel had the benefit of first hand practical experience of a similar situation earlier on his life, as we all know. He was saved by an angel and this alone must be a HUGE factor in all his future decisions involving worship. Have you faced down a king and physically been saved by an angel? I thought not, so there is no need to ‘go out’ with all guns blazing.

    I guess a time will come, when God will make it clear when we have to draw a line in the sand. Until that time keep your head low depending how much you want to interact with the congregation. Personally I don’t go to the meetings,but still participate in the Field Ministry. So, in order for me to fulfil Jesus’ commission in the best way possible for me, namely in the FS, I don’t say to much that will jeopardise that privilege of service to our God and His Christ. However the Bros and Sis do know that I don’t agree with the FDS but I’ve not allowed them to pin anything on me. So for the time being they know something is up, but have to leave me alone.

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  3. stranger says:

    Myself, I left the JW’s because I felt emotionally and physically depressed. When I was at the meetings or on the ministry I just wanted to die. I never ever experienced any closeness, unity or peace when I was among them. I believed it was the “Truth” but I felt so depressed and suicidal when I was in there company or when I was reading there literature. So it was relatively easy for me to get away from them. What tormented me though was being judged by them for it, being called weak, being called unrighteous or worldly, being told I was unworthy of the truth, that I was not looking for the truth and that I did not have the right heart and did not want the truth. And the worst one of all was being told I was not allowed to pray to God any more, because I did not accept “his organisation” and so he would not listen to me. That one really killed me inside.
    So leaving them physically was quite simple, but mentally and emotionally they had a hold on me for years. But I believe I am free now, and after this long and hard battle, I tell you, I would never go back to “THE VOMIT or WALLOWING IN THE MIRE” again. There not worth it.

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  4. LonelySheep says:

    Oh I forgot to mention, I met up with another awake JW whom I got to know through the e-Jehovah’s witness forum. It was really a great experience to touch and see a fellow brother in arms. Anycase, he told me how he answers up at the meetings and corrects anything he thinks is suspect. He says that every time he speaks the whole hall goes quiet. I told him that I’m surprised he hasn’t be D’Fellowshiped but apparently his brother-in law is on the body of elders so ‘has his back’. But he believes time is running for himself. So it can be done, but boy you have to some canoochees.

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  5. stranger says:

    lonesomesheep
    You said “he answers up at the meetings and corrects anything he thinks is suspect”.

    What will that change? I mean that’s the same as someone turning up at an earthquake with a dustpan and brush.
    Totally pointless man.

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    • Dennis says:

      stranger:
      lonesomesheep
      You said “he answers up at the meetings and corrects anything he thinks is suspect”.

      What will that change? I mean that’s the same assomeone turning up at an earthquake with a dustpan and brush.
      Totally pointless man.

      Howdy Stranger,

      I do say that in the short term it probably won’t change much. In the long run, it just might plant a seed that God may see fit to cause grow at some future point. You just never know. But the motivation to change things is not the only purpose here. IMO, it is never pointless to stand up for the truth. Standing up for the truth is reason enough for the brothers actions regardless if it changes anything or not with the brothers. Anyway, that’s just how I see it. :)

      Your brother in Christ,

      Dennis

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  6. JWB says:

    Andrew, it is so refreshing to hear such expressions from someone like yourself who has the right attitude of mind, the spiritual mind as opposed to the religious (ritualistic) mind. History bears witness to many integrity keepers who put the truth first, and declared it, in the face of much hardship. Thank you for this encouraging post.

    This reminds me of one of my favourite ‘Kingdom Songs’, number 88 (from the 1966 songbook) called “Walking in Integrity”, based on Psalm 26. The chorus to that song is as follows.

    “But, as for me, Determined I shall be, To walk eternally In my integrity.”

    Before I got baptized I remember reading in the “Aid to Bible Understanding”, something similar to that found in this extract:

    “It should be noted that the one being baptized in water enters a special relationship as Jehovah’s servant, to do His will. THE INDIVIDUAL DOES NOT DETERMINE WHAT THE WILL OF GOD IS FOR HIM, BUT IT IS GOD WHO MAKES THE DECISION AS TO THE USE OF THE INDIVIDUAL AND THE PLACING OF SUCH ONE IN THE FRAMEWORK OF HIS PURPOSES.” “[T]hose who undergo Christian baptism become God’s property, his slaves, TO EMPLOY AS HE SEES FIT. (1Co 6:20)” (Insight Vol 1, Baptism, “A Person’s Place in God’s Purpose”)

    When I got baptized, before the mid-eighties when it was completely changed, the second baptism vow was this:

    “On the basis of this faith in God and in his provision for salvation, have you dedicated yourself unreservedly to God to do his will henceforth AS HE REVEALS IT TO YOU THROUGH JESUS CHRIST AND THROUGH THE BIBLE UNDER THE ENLIGHTENING POWER OF THE HOLY SPIRIT?” (Baptizing Follows Discipling, “Who can be a disciple?”, paragraph 25)

    We must always remember that our dedication to God was made to him alone with recognition of his beloved son Jesus Christ as our Leader. We may originally have truly believed that the GB was God’s ‘sole channel of communication’, but if we truly believe that our Heavenly Father has revealed to us through Jesus Christ and through the Bible under the enlightening power of His spirit something different, then we should accept that. However, our dedication and baptism is still in force, and as such we should still follow the leadings of God’s spirit as it directs us personally in our own lives. It may be the time to move on, but it is not the time to give up.

    There is plenty to do in “the work of the Lord” and many ways in which we can have a positive influence on others. Remember, Christ is reigning in the midst of his enemies. It is the purpose of the Kingdom to restore everything back to perfection until that last enemy death is gone forever (1 Cor. 15:24, 25). In the meantime I think one of the ways we can show our support of the Kingdom is by resisting various enemies in the guise of religious “rule”, “authority” and “power”.

    I think there is before us a door open before us for a specific ministry, as originally started by Christ himself, to “bring good news to the afflicted”, to “bind up the brokenhearted” and to “proclaim liberty to the captives and freedom to prisoners”. Many of us have the background and experience to do this work and the motivation within our hearts to help our brothers and sisters in the Christian faith who continue to be under a yoke of mental slavery. This work requires caution (“a time and a place for everything”), as for many there are family relationships at stake, but at the end of the day as Andrew has pointed out, we must walk in integrity.

    I also want to state here my appreciation for all those men and women of intregrity that have gone before us and helped open our own eyes.

    Your brother,

    JWB

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  7. LonelySheep says:

    Stranger, I like your analogy. You are right it won’t change anything, but individuals will know hear an alternative to what is dished out,and we don’t know how his comments might touch an individual.

    I really brought up the point to give Andrew, who wrote the article another angle regarding his own internal struggles. Andrew mentioned in his article about standing up for truth, citing Daniel as an example. I provided this brother as an example of a ‘modern day Daniel’ who is standing up for truth and ‘getting away’ with it. Who knows, Jesus may have a similar role in mind for Andrew?

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  8. AwareBeing says:

    Ways To Exemplify Daniel’s Integrity

    For us who admire men of spiritual strength and godly courage, Daniel is a servant of God that shows unique traits for us to learn from. His life’s story, and the history of this Bible book teaches how to identify some falsehoods, and how to pray properly to Yehuwah. Two traps of Satan to keep God’ servants from being people of integrity are, doubting the authenticity of the book, and the belief that a spiritual head can dictate our personal integrity to God.

    Bible critics claim that Daniel was written at a later date by repatriated Hebraic Priests, however the Qumran texts (now fully examined) proves the book’s accuracy. It’s; morphology, grammar, syntax, and vocabulary identifies that “Daniel” is from the time and place that is mentioned in it. Specifically; 1) the “flexible vowel composition” of “Eastern Aramaic” during the period that it was used, and 2) placing it inside the Babylonian empire and surrounding wadi deserts. From the Qumran’s writing to our modern translation’s, only seventeen spelling corrections were needed; so it’s content and teachings have not been changed from Daniel’s time! We can take comfort in that our adherence to this Bible book was not in vain and should apply it all the more so in our lives.

    Men who wield power are another way the great adversary has in confounding the faithful. Daniel had to go up against; kings, leading priests of the false god’s, and his own head ones of God’s people. As for us, we couldn’t hardly be persons of high morals and good character if we allowed others to interpret God’s standards to us; that wouldn’t be using our consciences! Thus; even religious leaders of many years, should not come between us and the Bible’s instructions on godly values and the ethical treatment of of our “neighbors.”

    Correct prayers, done three times a day; compared to prayers to men? We’ve been told that there’s no formula to prayer, yet certain requirements are expected of us by these said “elders!” Such as; face them who are on a platform, close your eyes to what their doing, bow your heads before them, and don’t touch or hold your family during their prayers. In other words; don’t look to Yehuwah God, don’t realize they’re ‘gettin off’ on your adulation of them, do acknowledge that you are to bow before them as “princes” in the “new world”, and now separate your attachments to your family responsibilities to let “elders” and their organization’s “masters” control every aspect of you and your family’s lives until death. What we’re hearing today is so different from the days of Daniel. In many translations the Psalms instruct the truly faithful to; “lift up your hands”-63:3-5. Josephus wrote that looking to the heavens with arms raised was the way prayer was conducted. Bible scholars explain that this was replaced by looking at the text while praying by rote. There-fore; if we want our prayers to be honest before God, it needs to come from the heart and be directed to Him through Messiah, not Mary, or ‘religious’ men.

    From just three points it is clear that Daniel’s example is; worthy to be imitated, that his actions reflect the will of Yehuwah God, and that those who try to detour us from living by these biblical directives are part of ‘”Belial”‘s brood’. So it is for us to draw strength form God, pray worthily to Him, and follow the lead of good personalities in the Bible; rather than those of questionable character in today’s world.

    Walking with Jehuwah; A.B.

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  9. stranger says:

    I suppose the way I see it brothers is like this, that if you truly have a heart, a conscience and a strong sense of justice and truth, then you would not be sitting in any kingdom hall making any comments because you would not be able to bear being in such a place. And the same goes for those who continue to go to the kingdom hall.

    That’s the way I see it my dear brethren and always have, from a very young age to.
    So, I apologise now to all those (probably most of you) who may find my words disagreeable and discouraging. I am sorry brothers, but that’s the way I feel.

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    • Dennis says:

      stranger:
      I suppose the way I see it brothers is like this, that if you truly have aheart, a conscience and a strong sense of justice and truth, then you would not be sitting in any kingdom hall making any comments because you would not be able to bear being in such a place. And the same goes for those who continue to go to the kingdom hall.

      That’s the way I see it my dear brethren and always have, from a very young age to.
      So, I apologise now to all those (probably most of you) who may find my words disagreeable and discouraging. I am sorry brothers, but that’s the way I feel.

      Stranger,

      No need to apologize at all. Your comments are always welcome here. Never feel that you need to hold back when you have a strong conviction on an issue. We can take it, no problem. There is truth in your line of reasoning above. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

      Dennis

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  10. andrew says:

    Thank you all for your comments. I know I will be eventually completely leaving the organization and that day may be swiftly approaching. Mentally I am totally free, but because of certain circumstances have been still attending Sunday meetings.

    The Watchtower studies lately have been so disgusting. I feel myself getting angry while sitting at the KH.

    Although there are fine things that are also taught, I feel spiritual growth is just not possible in the tyrannical atmosphere that exists right now in the organization.

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  11. jacqueline says:

    Go to this they are blogging about your site.

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.ne.....Everywhere

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  12. Stranger’s sentiments echo mine, exactly. To be baptised into the Organization required that I lie. The terms of being a witness are clearly spelled out. Any deviation of belief from ANY doctrine automatically renders a worshipper subject to expulsion from the congregations. This, from men who do not claim infallability. They demand treatment as though they WERE infallible.

    What about it? What do you think when you meet people whose words and actions are opposed to one another? Which speak louder to you about what is real, and what is not?

    I studied the doctrines. I wanted to be able to make a firm, scriptural defense when the need arose. And without completely coming to my own conclusions, I was quickly sent to knock on doors and bear witness. Bear witness to what?

    Well, I found myself telling non-believers that the End of this System and the (visible?) return of Christ was guaranteed to occur before the generation of 1914 passed from the scene. Why did I say such a thing? Because the WT Society deemed it to be true. I did not reach that conclusion on my own. There was no time for such trivialities.

    And now we know, brothers. Now we know that teaching was demonstrably FALSE. I was prodded along to propogate a teaching that was sold as having certain Biblical truth, and behold! It did not.

    Needless to say, I became troubled. As I ought to have become – presenting a doctrine as though it were from Jehovah God himself is no small matter. Indeed, the opposite is true. It’s an incredibly weighty thing, to be ‘fishers of men’. The responsibility is enormous, as the risk of stumbling others is profound.

    How much better would it be to have a preaching work that did not present such empty speculations as Biblical truth. Now I know why even the inspired apostles themselves kept their message simple and modest. It was a protection for both them and for those to whom they preached. Paul’s wisdom of 1 Corinthians 2:2 is made plain.

    So there we are. The way I see it is, participation and visibility as a Witness carries with it an implicit statement, namely, that one is firmly in agreement and wholly believes every word of doctrine from the WT Society. It is a lie that I was/am unwilling to tell. Of course, telling the truth cost me much angish and heartache, continuing to this day. But, it was clearly the only road I could take.

    What was I to do? Go along to get along? What else would I find myself telling some householder that I did not believe myself? Where does that road lead? Lots of drinking and pills to sooth the conscience, if the local congregation is any indication.

    This religion is a mess, as it must be. Actions have consequences, and this unfortunate set of circumstances is entirely predictable. Any measure of Holy Spirit that the Organization enjoyed in previous years, in my opinion, has been largely, if not completely, withdrawn. The lack of love in the Congregations in appalling, especially when considering that Witnesses claim to be the only True Christians on earth.

    Sorry for the vent, all. But really, if you don’t have integrity, you have nothing at all. Sometimes, the price of keeping it is enormous, but better than the alternative…

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    • Dennis says:

      TheSynchronicity:
      Stranger’s sentiments echo mine, exactly.To be baptised into the Organization required that I lie.The terms of being a witness are clearly spelled out.Any deviation of belief from ANY doctrine automatically renders a worshipper subject to expulsion from the congregations.This, from men who do not claim infallability.They demand treatment as though they WERE infallible.

      What about it?What do you think when you meet people whose words and actions are opposed to one another?Which speak louder to you about what is real, and what is not?

      I studied the doctrines.I wanted to be able to make a firm, scriptural defense when the need arose.And without completely coming to my own conclusions, I was quickly sent to knock on doors and bear witness.Bear witness to what?

      Well, I found myself telling non-believers that the End of this System and the (visible?) return of Christ was guaranteed to occur before the generation of 1914 passed from the scene.Why did I say such a thing?Because the WT Society deemed it to be true.I did not reach that conclusion on my own.There was no time for such trivialities.

      And now we know, brothers.Now we know that teaching was demonstrably FALSE.I was prodded along to propogate a teaching that was sold as having certain Biblical truth, and behold!It did not.

      Needless to say, I became troubled.As I ought to have become – presenting a doctrine as though it were from Jehovah God himself is no small matter.Indeed, the opposite is true.It’s an incredibly weighty thing, to be ‘fishers of men’.The responsibility is enormous, as the risk of stumbling others is profound.

      How much better would it be to have a preaching work that did not present such empty speculations as Biblical truth.Now I know why even the inspired apostles themselves kept their message simple and modest.It was a protection for both them and for those to whom they preached.Paul’s wisdom of 1 Corinthians 2:2 is made plain.

      So there we are.The way I see it is, participation and visibility as a Witness carries with it an implicit statement, namely, that one is firmly in agreement and wholly believes every word of doctrine from the WT Society.It is a lie that I was/am unwilling to tell.Of course, telling the truth cost me much angish and heartache, continuing to this day.But, it was clearly the only road I could take.

      What was I to do?Go along to get along?What else would I find myself telling some householder that I did not believe myself?Where does that road lead?Lots of drinking and pills to sooth the conscience, if the local congregation is any indication.

      This religion is a mess, as it must be.Actions have consequences, and this unfortunate set of circumstances is entirely predictable.Any measure of Holy Spirit that the Organization enjoyed in previous years, in my opinion, has been largely, if not completely, withdrawn.The lack of love in the Congregations in appalling, especially when considering that Witnesses claim to be the only True Christians on earth.

      Sorry for the vent, all.But really, if you don’t have integrity, you have nothing at all.Sometimes, the price of keeping it is enormous, but better than the alternative…

      Vent anytime you like! I enjoyed your post.

      Dennis

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  13. stranger says:

    Brother Dennis….thank you.

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  14. Thomas says:

    I agree with many of your sentiments bros. However it does sadden me that the
    negativity is running so high. Some of us can’t stay in…and half to leave. Thats their conscense. Others however feel that the friends in the hall are
    loving and they can make a tangible difference and so stay. Can I still have Jehovah’s blessing if I don’t leave the KH is a question for you.

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    • andrew says:

      Hi Thomas

      I feel this is an issue that each one must work out for himself. As you’ve seen many feel one must leave in order to have a clean conscience.

      For me personally I feel I also must leave and will be doing so in the future. However you may feel differently. God all gave us a conscience to work through these difficult matters. We should listen to it.

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    • Thomas, I think Andrew gives you the most reasonable answer available to you.

      I think the Spirit has called some of us out into the wilderness. The same Spirit moves others to stay and work within the walls of the Organization. We all have different situations…different gifts…different work to do.

      As long as we recognize and respect each others’ decisions, we can remain brothers working toward the Kingdom. God is a reader of hearts, and he has not passed along that vision to men, no matter what they may claim.

      But you know, I have family currently bound by the WT Society, and I do worry for them at times. The burdens of being a Witness have always been heavy, and lately, even moreso. It does give me some comfort to know that there are brothers like you, who go where I cannot, and look after folks like my family.

      If you follow your conscience and keep your integrity, I have no doubt that Jehovah will bless your efforts. Maybe the day comes when you are called to leave. Maybe the day comes when I am called to return. None of us can know all the details of Jehovah’s plan, and that’s where faith comes into play. Without knowing each step we will walk by faith in God and his Son, and in the end we will all be together. When that day comes, all these weighty issues will seem so small, I am sure.

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  15. JWB says:

    AwareBeing, very good points about the generally accepted method of praying at the Kingdom Halls. I’d never really thought about it that manner before. What an interesting way of psychological manipulation! Your observations about avoidance of physical contact with family members while praying gives me cause for concern.

    It seems the WTS is quite adept at convincing many to transfer their natural loyalty and affections for family to ‘Jehovah’. I put the name in quotes, because in my view, they put themselves on a par with Moses as exclusively and divinely appointed spokesperson and thus become “God” to JWs (compare Exodus 7:1; “… Moses was told that he was being made ‘God to Pharaoh,’ that is, given divine power and authority over Pharaoh …” [Insight Vol 2, Moses, “Moses not disqualified because of diffidence”]).

    TheSynchronicity, what a great post you made, and how true!

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    • AwareBeing says:

      Thank you JWB!

      It’s agreed that they employ the double switch trick. These are called; “displacement” of family love and affection with God, while quietly using “transference” to insert themselves into His elevated love and loyalty requirements.

      Both words in “quotations” are psychological exercises. The first act is to redirect effects from an object to another that’s made to feel (more) safe or acceptable, then the second act is to create a god-like or guru status amoung the targeted person(s).

      Good work on your encouraging us who post! So are still dealing with difficulties, and you can go a long way in helping others to feel better.

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  16. SIAM says:

    Andrew,

    Thank you so much for this blog post. I am struggling with exactly the things that you mentioned. To keep my personal integrity I have to leave the organization. I cannot “pretend” any longer to support the doctrines of men that are called falsely the sayings of God. Keeping integrity is never said to be easy, but I am surprised at how hard it really is. The fact that we are having this very conversation tells me that this cannot be God’s organization. God is love, he shows justice and wisdom and mercy. He undoubtedly can see that the Watchtower is taking his name and committing crimes against its followers, and he must be disgusted. If this were God’s true organization, they would not punish people for standing up for righteousness.

    I spoke to a good friend the other day about my situation. He was incredulous at how standing up for what is right in “god’s organization” would carry such a high cost and will ultimately lead to my being designated as Evil, a fighter against god, and of course mentally diseased.

    For those of us born into the religion it is even more conflicting. The unique beliefs of Jehovah’s Witnesses are all we know. You are trained to stand up for what is right especially in terms of your faith. When you realize that the organization is not what it claims to be, there is a tremendous amount of internal conflict as you wrestle with the heavy responsibility of standing up for the truth, by rejecting the organizational foundation of your core beliefs.

    Many times this means that your family will desert you as they blindly stand by the false organization. This brings much pain on top of the pain that you already experience from realizing that your life up to this point was devoted to lies generated by men. It is crazy how intertwined your faith, social relationships, and even professional relationships become.

    Where this will end for me is unclear. Life is too short to pretend to support a false religious organization. Life is too short to pretend to support something that want to see destroyed. Every time I go to the meeting and passively support the organizational doctrines by my simple attendance, a piece of me dies inside. Jehovah built within us the desire to see justice done, the ability to reason on the scriptures using logic, and yet the Watchtower wants us to ignore these gifts from God and blindly give obedience to the Governing Body.

    I cannot do it anymore.

    Take care brothers

    SIAM

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    • Amos says:

      A word of encouragement from our Lord brothers. Mark 10:23-31.
      Please take particular notice to V 30;

      23 “But Yeshua gazed at his disciples and he said to them, “How hard it is for those who have wealth to enter the Kingdom of God!” 24 But the disciples were astonished at his words. And Yeshua answered again and he said to them, “Children, how hard it is for those who rely upon their wealth to enter the Kingdom of God!” 25 “It is easier for a camel to enter into the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God.” 26 But they were all the more astonished, and they were saying among themselves, “Who can be saved?” 27 But Yeshua gazed upon them and he said to them, “With the sons of men, this is impossible, but not with God; everything is possible with God.”

      28Kaypha began to say, “Behold, we have left everything and have cleaved to you.” 29 Yeshua answered and said, “Amen, I say to you, there is no man who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or town for my sake and for my Gospel’s sake, 30 Who will not receive each one an hundredfold NOW IN THIS TIME, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and towns, with persecutions, and in the world that is coming, eternal life. 31 But many are first who shall be last, and the last first.”

      I have personally been in the deepest pits possible at times, but our loving Heavenly Father has always sustained me. If we remember Davids despair & his God given advice at Ps. 55:22;

      22 “Cast your cares upon Lord Jehovah and he will support you, and he will never give terror to his righteous ones.”

      These verses are from the “Aramaic NT in Plain English”

      Your brother in our Fathers Kingdom!

      Amos

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  17. rus virgil says:

    Hello brothers,
    seeing so much struggle here I am thinking that is right to tell you a few words:

    “hello dear brothers and friends,
    it is really joy to see that people escape from Babylon and from the “daughter of Babylon” (Zeccariah 2:7 )

    we have the promise that the Spirit of Truth (the real Channel of truth ) will teach us from God’s word , according to Father’s will
    John 16
    13. “But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes,
    He will guide you into all the truth;
    for He will not speak on His own initiative,
    but whatever He hears, He will speak;
    and He will disclose to you what is to come.

    Having made some research from Bible , I’ll invite you to see what the Spirit has helped us to understand during the last years :

    The Kingdom of God – when in Heaven ? — according to “Jesus’ teaching”
    http://reslight.net/forum/inde.....862.0.html

    THE BIBLE CHRONOLOGY REVEALED
    http://reslight.net/forum/inde.....207.0.html

    ELIJAH’s VOICE
    http://brothersofchrist.forums.....out40.html

    The teaching of Christ — 2 John 1:9
    http://www.paradisecafediscuss.....p?tid=1116

    Are JWs Exclusively God’s People?
    http://hourglass2outpost.com/f.....php?id=231

    with love
    in Christ,
    rus virgil

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  18. Alden says:

    Dear Andrew,

    Do you still have a ministry in your congregation? Pursue that ministry! Have you found a better ministry somewhere else? Pursue that ministry! It’s a matter of serving and not being served, although we should, indeed, be being served a little better “food” from the WTS than what we’ve been getting (like last Sunday’s WT!). There is “food” from other sources, too, and no one can deprive us of these, unless we let them.

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  19. JWB says:

    AwareBeing. Brother/Sister, never forget that you are not alone. Many of us have travelled the difficult path of personal integrity, it is definitely not for the fainthearted! But despite the heartache there is a reward to be had.

    Brother Amos, thanks for your great words of encouragement!

    rus virgil, welcome. Yes, there are many interesting things to be uncovered by those who do serious Bible research without being completely dependent on one source of information and opinion.

    Siam, I enjoy reading your posts. Chin up friend!

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    • AwareBeing says:

      Thank you JWB! Just reading that gives me the encouragement needed to continue on in helping others like us. Your right about the challenges that we face, we don’t have an organization for support. But we do have this brotherhood of those who have been tested by the fire! As the GB becomes even more isolated and untrustworthy; we’ll have to rely more and more on God and our association here.

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  20. John S. says:

    To all you strugglers;I was miserable like yourselves,but had the unique persecution of being pushed out of their hearts for my claim to becoming anointed.After partaking for 2 different years,and arguing and trying to “correct” things said from the platform(something I had been doing for over 30 years),I decided to quit fighting the Witnesses,who were really not my brothers in Christ anyway,and could never understand my mindset or the understanding I had of the scriptures.So as I was born again with a greater internal faith and power of the Holy Spirit,it was the only course for me;resign before a judicial committee,with an explanation and a signed and dated resignation,explaining my beliefs and why I could no longer support the falsehoods that had been perpetrated on Witnesses for decades.After almost 5 years,I have never looked back with regret,although,I miss my family’s association and many of my Witness friends.Now,after being online for 8 or 9 months,and with phone studies with other worshipers of Jehovah,I am not so lonely.The change is upon us.With the choice each day of the Watchtower slaves’ leaving and seeking out their bros. and sis. who have left,the new congregations are being started.”Watering holes”like this one are like oases in a vast desert,where we sojourners travel in search of friends,and more Bible understanding.May we encourage each other with Jesus’words and Bible passages that speak of the truth as the Holy Spirit wants us to know it.Thanks to you who had the courage to set up this site.Go on then in this power,”All the same,many,even of the rulers actually put faith in him,but because of the Pharisees they would not confess him,in order not to be expelled from the synagogue,for they loved the glory of men more than even the glory of God”.John 12:42,andLuke 9:25,26 which says,”Really,what does a man benefit himself if he gains the whole world but loses his own self or suffers damage?For whoever becomes ashamed of me and of my words,the son of man will be ashamed of this one when he arrives in his glory and that of the Father and of the holy angels.” Since this didn’t happen at the end of the Jewish system of things,but is foretold in the Revelation,a book penned 25 years after 70 c.e.(referring to Andrew’s comments about the millenium starting with Jerusalem’s destruction)and the great fulfillment of the worldwide spread of the Gospel took 2000 years,then it may be in our best interests not to linger around in the pits of dense spiritual darkness and strife that many have been experiencing so sadly at their meetings. Instead start something new by studying together these important subjects we are continually seeing discussed on this site and others.”Where 2 or 3 are gathered together in my name,….there I am in their midst.” Matt. 18:20 We believe that,don’t we?

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  21. andrew says:

    Thanks John S. for your encouragement. To everyone else also who has taken the time to give a work of encouragement: Thank you!

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  22. John S. says:

    Right on.Now let’s put some perspective into your scenario.You’ve got a ‘Rebel Alliance’ trying to unify dissenters from across the galaxy to unite in cyberspace,join forces,see what ammunition is available to fight off an ‘evil empire’that is breathing down your necks trying to destroy your homelife and families,expose you to the world as cowardly criminals that are condemned to eternal fire…..Yeah that seems to be just about it.Except its not a joke or a movie we’re talking about.But it is the stuff movies are made of.I would like to remind all ex-J.W.s and J.W.strugglers that Jesus promised if you followed him,picking up your torture stake(actually the historical evidence seems to favor cross)that you will be persecuted.Your own family members would turn on you,and your own countrymen will put some of you into prison and kill you.My wife of 35 years left me.She had no interest in these things I was pursuing,and viewed me as an apostate from the gitgo.Classic example of staying in the comfort zone(she was quite content to watch 6-8 hours of t.v. a day,go to one or two meetings a week,NEVER go in service,and hatdly ever read a Bible.Once in a while I would see her spend 10 minutes or so reading a W.T. Sunday a.m. before the meeting.) You brothers out there in the struggle,the last thing you’ll probably see ,no joke here,is you’re wife taking any interest in the ‘alliance’.Don’t expect much from them,as woman are GENERALLY followers,and have the ‘nesting’ instinct.As you know,we have to put up a strong fight in order to to things in this world as men,such as ,start a business,move to a new city,change employment,move away from ‘Momma'(a real biggie).Its sad that we can’t see more like sister ‘Pearl’,who have the cajones to stand up to the ‘Empire’ and go toe to toe with them.And how does she do it? I’ll tell you (what you already know)she has the awesome power of the Holy Spirit driving her,and she can’t do otherwise.You do too. You are not alone if you make the ‘break’,you have the flaming blade of the H.S. riding right above you.How else do you think you could have come this far without it? Realizing this,then,now is the time to make the push.Send out a general call on your site for all listeners to rally to unite in a common bond ,unify their forces motives and hearts.Start phone-link studies,collate scriptures on the more important topics,ask for volunteers to offer to get a basic booklet in page form made and gather finances together to print it and send it out on a donation basis so we can study it together.This is how a movement gets organized,gains strength and grows.The main two things we’re gonna need,I know from the past 4 years,is solid spiritual food,without any reference to W.T.criticism or considering of their ‘dogma’,(special emphasis on ‘dog’),and association.You need to meet people face to face so as to discern their pure motives and heart trustworthiness.There will have to be resources to collect and dispense,so trustworthy diakinos will have to be ‘appointed’ to bear these responsibilities.And you will have to find men and women who are filled with the spirit,yet able to work with a group in a peaceable way,without too much pride for the benefit of the new ones that are going to be collected.You can ask and get volunteers to reach out to visit across country at times ,searching out these spirit-moved ones to strengthen and encourage them as they take their stand. An office must be set up with a person making records,fielding phone calls,directing to pertinent web sites,and more.Bank accounts,research libraries,membership files,records,dates,records of talents available,and volunteers willing to come meet and work at this office.(Maybe an old large house where a small staff can live and work and a missionary base can start.This is the way it was done in the 1st century(Martha,Mary,and Lazarus’ house in Bethany)..Count me in.I’ll come.I have many talents to offer,and pioneered for years.I’m more than ready to get back into a bigger and better missionary work.The W.T. started this way too,but now it’s too big and self absorbed,destroying itself from within ,from people who are without spirit,eat up with legal and monetary concerns(not to mention too proud to change its antequated doctrines which if they ever did would result in a huge bleed-off of thinkers worlwide among them).We also need to start thinking international with a translation ability on your site.Do you know how strong minded the Japanese strugglers would be?And believe you me,the ‘Society’ has slandered them in the Watchtower for their peculiarities.Think about your fellow brothers and sisters,languishing in misery right now,being mistreated,skinned and thrown about by a bullying tyrannical,self serving burocracy that cares mostly about handling real estate,stock futures,and finding and CRUSHING dissenters who threaten their power and position.Remember the account of Jesus healing the man born blind from birth,how it was then the Pharisees decided to kill him,not because he was a true threat to God or his word,but to them as religious leaders.This is the same today.The W.T. Pharisees act in the same identical manner,trying to crush anointed Christians who are spirit-filled and acting like prophets.Claiming they alone are the source of truth,yet watering down their merssage with anti-gospel doctrine from Rutherford and his alcoholic,braggidocio,sucking down bottles of beer at Bethel,while smoking cigars and driving around in Cadillacs while everyone else was struggling to feed their kids.(look it up).The Lord Jesus Christ himself will help us do this thing if we put faith in him and take the nercessary steps.When will you be ready?Just let me know,I’m in.

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    • andrew says:

      I appreciate your enthusiasm John but personally I wouldn’t be interested in starting an organization or another denomination to take down the “evil empire”.

      First of all I don’t consider the organization to be my enemy. It has mistreated me but I recognize that it has also at times served as a force for good. Although being in our position it can be difficult to have a balanced opinion, I believe it is necessary.

      Being a Christian is a personal walk. It should be done with fellowship from other sincere Christians but that can be found locally and also online. IMO there is no need to start another organization. Some have found fellowship at local churches and others at home churches.

      Every denomination has started because of the same motives that you express and now there are thousands of them. I don’t believe it necessary to divide the body of Christ any further.

      Your brother
      Andrew

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  23. John S. says:

    I know it seems like it would be more of the same,you make a good point.The fellowship and clear call on doctrinal matters is what I am interested in.I will never join another church,enrollment in the church of the firstborn is the only one for me.Yet the websites discussing truer understanding of the important doctrinal or spiritual matters are like a church,as the people express their beliefs and hopefully bring praises to the Father and son.My problem is focusing on the 21’st century understanding of 144,000…Great Crowd,Millenial understanding,and how to dispense this knowledge to the interested parties,i.e…”preach the word,be at it urgently”.I realized the preaching I was invovlved with with W.T. was not the real gospel.They were never gonna change their thinking,about the Holy Spirit,the message of Christ,as he said,”wait in Jerusalem for it”.(Acts 1)They run people off who are blessed with it and who encourage others to accept its implanting.That’s why I can’t ever have anything to do with them,as they are not promoting real Christianity,only the principles and peripheral doctrine,not the real baptism,which is of the spirit. I am interested in writing a primer booklet as a Bible Study guide,like the old “Truth” book we used to study from,and was the tool we used to bring those first 3-4 million in with.Of course it will have the “Where are the dead?”,and “Who is God” chapters,etc.Yet will tell the full truth about the need to accept the holy spirit and let it live and guide us in life,not some organization. I will continue to peruse sites like your own for good info and suggestions as to subject matter,though,and have my earnest conviction stated clearly here,I don’t have all the answers and am not looking for earthly glory,as my time in this world is now very limited due to age,health and so on,and my desire is to magnify our God and our Lord and give my life so they are well and truly represented.

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